….wild is the wind…creative freedom is the seed….
Hong kong’s innovation is our ability to stay deeply Cantonese (keeping one hand on the ancients) at the same time as we do play-time with every known and unknown empire that rise and fall on this earth….so when pommes were in charge we do Bruce Lee with a Man.U “feel”, when Americans hung out we do Stephen Chow with a touch of Disney and when its Commie North….lol. we just Andy Lau & Eminem their commie arses with a bit of Scouse Power! Life is like that….the ONE thing WE NEVER DO is Apologise for being who we are! Asking a Hong Kong Cantonse to apologise for being ourselves and trying to Change us with Propaganda, is an Invitation to WAR!
The perfect Cantonese :
i) Has always been from Southern China is Tang, at least for the last 3000 yrs.
ii) Has 5 generations in HK
iii) Has at least a double degree (law or eco) and Masters in law, Eco or biz.and will complete his or her Ph.D in due time!
iv) will retire and run the Hong kong Legislative council.
v) teaches at a university as a hobby.
vi) Has 1.8 kids and the daughters always get the most education.
vii) Is perfectly extroverted and can argue in their sleep.
viii) Speaks at least 2.5 languages fluently.
iX) Has a Platinum credit card (one in each kind) but NEVER EVER use the credit up at all.
x) plays musical house around the world.
xi) Is a member of the Hong kong jockey club, hong kong sailing club or HK legislative council.
xii) Will tell endless stories about how they downsized to a hovel to make sure their children goes to an Ivy or a Group of 8 school!
xiii) Would rather kill their kids then have them underachieve.
xiv) Have at least 1 Child Running a Major Fortune 50 institution and another one Running the vatican and/or some Ivy unversity..
xv) Have grandparents who went to school with Sun Yat sen and spits regularly on pictures of Chairman Mao (that I do! No worries!)
xvi) Plays musical instruments like Yoyo ma and compose peotry like Li Ba AND is a Professional artist as a hobby.
xvii) Never lets a deal go and NEVER allow someone else to get the last word in an argument, even if it takes 1000 yrs to settle the score!
xviii) Has travelled to every place in the known world and tasted all the food/culture there but ONLY deep down wants to eat simple fish balls and rice soups! (in manner of good Taoist)
xiix) Either does Shaolin and/or Tai chi to grandmaster level!
xix) Knows all 5-9 generations of their equally perfect relatives and respects them all! In fact, they all holiday together like in the sitcoms!
xx) is Perfectly cynical about everything that happens to the world because EVERYTHING is a trade/life opportunity to be optimistically piranha about money, activities, culture & innovation! Take no prisoners!
We are the original people who invented the concept of The Corporation BUT remember WE are ALSO the First place to have a Community Chest in Asia that made sure we provided decent Schools, Education, Hospitals & Elderly Care to the poor, the refugees who came to us seeking political asylum from oppressive dictatorships! We don’t always get things right, but we gave it a good shot! There are problems in Hong kong, lets not pretend otherwise. But once upon a time, we took the money out of Confiscated EARNINGS from EXCESSIVE INSIDER TRADING, stupid bookies Race-fixing at Hong Kong Jockey Club and whenever we Get hold of the Tax evasion of Drug lords, we confiscate the lot (usually in Bars of Gold) and put it to build hospitals and stuff!!!!!! Why don’t we do this again and more of it?
If you are going to be “nuts” like a good Cantonese….be a PERFECT CANTONESE, USE YOUR CONSCIENCE!
P.S I don’t want to be Rude to Dr. Sun Yat Sen…but he really really really goes on in Cantonese, nagging the nation to be educated, to be intelligent , be Democratic…etc…etc…in the same type of Voice as my Grandpa…they just will not stop nagging until they get their way…its like….some sort of NLP or just pure nag-nag-nag until you do what they want!!!!! I challenge you to be able to Sit through the entire recording of Dr. Sun doing Cantonese NAGGING on RADIO!!!!!!
If you speak a different Dialect of chinese other than Cantonese, this is a Traditional Chinese transcript:
Thanks for the “like” Lesley Carter and keeping in touch. I know you are so busy with your online magazine. It is amazing that you get 80,000 hits a month on your blog and about 1 million follow!!!! You are another brilliant Aussie and I’m glad we blog-conneccted!:) XO XO (CC)
P.S I got Muzungu to contact you re: our eco-project…see how it goes…..if its not your “thing” I can send him over to elephantjournal…they have a good following too! 🙂
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I simply wanted to thank you so much once again. This is an intimidating blog for me! Looking at your specialisation, it made me weep with delight. lol. I am thankful for your guidance and hope you are aware of the amazing job you are undertaking in teaching the mediocre ones thru your webblog. You have never all of us…but you talk as if you have.
Thank you for your lovely comment. Happy Easter & Happy Holi! Cecilia
For everyone, Antonio suggested that maybe some of you need to read the “flip side” to all this insane “Hong kong injoke”…this is ALSO hong kong! 🙂 http://www.cnngo.com/hong-kong/life/how-be-local-10-tips-faking-it-316802
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Oui, merci, mais peut-etre, je ne besoin pas des milliers de fans ….mais alors, vous etes tres gentil (e)? 🙂 Excusez-moi, mon français est terrible, j’ai besoin de beacoup de pratique! 🙂
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From Cecilia: I will as soon as I learn fluent Polish? haha. goodluck! Thank you. Maybe you could do with some pictures? (CC)